Look, it happens.
There is that ONE thing in your life that is driving you nuts.
Perhaps it’s a co-worker who chews gum loudly in your ear all day.
Perhaps it’s that your mate leaves the kitchen cabinets open every time they use them.
Perhaps it’s something that feels a bit bigger, like your job, career or relationships in general.
Take heart, this article will change your life.
Don’t Let Your Toe Ruin Your Life!
When your toe is throbbing, how do you stop paying attention to it?
Sure, you’ve tried to think nice thoughts about your toe.
You’ve tried to ignore your toe.
You’ve tried to release the energetic trauma your toe is holding on to.
But no matter what you’ve done, you’re still obsessing (only slightly, of course ;) over that darn toe.
You start to think “If only….”
“If only that co-worker would quit.”
“If only my mate would take my feelings into consideration.”
“If only I could quit, find my passion or get a soul-mate in my life…
…THINGS WOULD BE BETTER.”
Don’t Let Your Toe Ruin Your Life! Part II
As long as you’re focusing on how much that throbbing toe hurts, you’re going to have problems. Why?
Whatever you focus on expands.
So what if I tell you to stop thinking negative thoughts and just start thinking good thoughts about that aching toe?
You might tell me to go soak my head. In which case, you’d be right.
If the idea of trying to think positive about a situation, relationship or life event makes you want to cringe then I say “Don’t Go There”.
Chances are you’ll just be faking your positive attitude and you’ll create more negativity in your life…
…only this time you’ll REALLY be mad because you’ve been trying to say those darn affirmations every day in the mirror…
…only to find they aren’t working!
“Ok, Alora, so what DO I do?”
Why My Husband is Driving Me Crazy!!!
My husband often leaves cabinets open after he’s used them.
Sometimes I walk into the kitchen to find two or three cabinet doors standing wide open. When we’re in the kitchen together it’s like a constantly changing obstacle course with sharp corners.
The same goes for the cabinets in the bathroom, the garage, the hall closets, the bedroom closets…
At first this didn’t bother me at all. After all, when you’re dating, everything is “cute”.
But over time this started to drive me bonkers.
I tried to not say anything.
I tried to ask him to close them when he was done.
I tried to “be fair” about it because, after all, I have my quirks, too.
None of this was working. In fact, it was making it worse!
The more I tried to feel OK and find solutions about The Cabinet Thing the more I noticed the cabinets and the more they bugged me.
Soon I started to notice other things about my husband that drove me nuts…
…like how he’ll keep locking the doors on the mini-van while I’m still trying to get the kid’s stuff out of it.
…or how he’ll come to bed and drop his shoes in the middle of the floor where I trip on them in the dark heading to the bathroom. Arg!!!
Do you see a pattern here?
Pretty soon I was noticing a whole HOST of things my husband did that bothered me.
I started thinking about it more, talking about it more and, eventually, nagging him.
Our fantastic relationship started spiraling down into domestic dispute and despair.
How I Saved Our Relationship
I thought to myself “this is how future divorce starts”. I didn’t want that! So I decided to give this “think big” thing a try.
Since the biggest thing you can ask for in a relationship is harmony I focused on that.
I got out my journal and wrote about how much I loved my husband and why I married him.
I wrote down what I was grateful for.
I wrote down things the kind of life I wanted us to have as if we already had it.
“We laugh together all the time”
“I feel so in love with my husband.”
I wrote for about 5-10 minutes a day for two or three days when all of a sudden I realized I didn’t care about the cabinets or locks or the shoes - I was SO HAPPY.
The Universe Did It!
It worked! As soon as I focused on the big picture the Universe took care of the details.
Did it get my husband to pick up after himself?
No! He still leaves the cabinets open, he still locks me out of the car and his shoes are probably in the middle of the bedroom as I type this. Only now I don’t care.
In fact, I don’t even notice. 99% of the time I dodge or flow around these things without even thinking about it.
As soon as I do start to notice them and they bother me, I now know it’s ME being out of alignment with harmony in our relationship.
If I catch it early on, even just one journal-time of focusing on the bigger picture puts me right back on track, in love again and oblivious to his cabinet capers.
Now For You
Let the Universe arrange things for you.
Instead of focusing on that co-worker’s habits, think instead about flowing throughout your workday efficiently and with ease. Think about coming home and telling someone how great your day was.
Instead of obsessing about which job/class/route to take in your life…
…picture a you that wakes up totally happy, inspired and in love with your affluent bank account(s) and your life.
Picture the feeling of fulfillment.
Picture telling a friend “I love my life and I have no idea how I got here - how awesome is that?”
It’ll Work Out Perfect But Only If You…
Don’t try NOT to obsess over the thing that’s bothering you.
Don’t try to figure out HOW to fix it.
What you focus on expands. So if you focus on the details of life that bother you you’ll keep attracting them.
You’ll change jobs only to discover you have a new boss with the same problems.
You’ll move only to discover your new town feels just as empty as the last one.
And you’ll divorce your husband only to attract someone else who may shut the cabinets but who leaves the toilet seat up instead.
By focusing bigger you can stop obsessing about “WHAT should I do to change this?” “WHEN is this going to get better?” “WHAT do I need to do to get out of this cycle?”
Instead, you can focus on the feeling of what you are REALLY seeking - which is to feel connected, inspired and in love with your life…
…while the daily details take care of themselves, cabinets and all.
Love you, Alora :)
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