I have a lot of information I offer. A lot. A lot lot lot. So recently while I was pondering life in a sacred space (getting ready for the day in the bathroom) I asked myself: "How do I boil this down? How do I give you the essence of what I teach, what I do, and how I live in an easily digestible way?"
So I boiled. And.... voila! Here is it. A recipe for life.
So, if you are having trouble, visit this checklist to see where you need to tweak things. Remember, a great soup happens when all the flavors of the dish work in harmony. Yum.
My 7 Ingredient Soup for Living A ReallyGoodLife:
Some might call this "don't be co-dependent" but I think of it as a two-parter. You have the outer part which is you and other people. Don't give your power away to them (be co-dependent). But then what? That's the inner part. Remember you ARE Source. Connect to yourself. Connect to Source. Be inner-connected. Hooking up with Source means an endless supply of love, rejuvenation and acceptance. You can't not be something. Instead of trying not to be co-defendant be self-contained instead.
Seek Highest-Good Relief
This is the main reason why Positive Thinking or Law of Attraction or Success Mindset stuff doesn't work for many people. You can't just seek joy when you feel terrible. You need to seek relief first. But if you haven't decided to be happy no matter what, chances are your relief may be in the form of a short-term fix that has long-term negative effects. (Eat the whole cake, anyone? Or send that email you should have deleted instead? Or buy that thing? Or all those things?) Intend highest-good relief instead. When you learn to discern which choices are positive relief and which are destructive relief your entire life changes because now EVERYTHING is life-affirming. Even binging on Netflix. With a whole cake. In front of a new TV. But only if it feels aligned, yo.
Share From Solution
As much as you are able (because you will fail at this) don't complain. I'm serious. No more complaining. Not out loud. Not on Facebook. Not on email. Not anywhere. Your brain is a capitalist. It makes more of what is sold. If you complain a lot your brain makes more complaints. If you stop complaining out loud your brain makes less complaints and starts making more of what you are communicating instead. That's just good business. And since what you focus on becomes your life, when you stop complaining your life will positively shift into a life that requires no complaints. That doesn't mean you can't talk about what is bothering you, but when you do talk about it, you speak from a Solution Mindset. Like this. "Honey, when you leave your shoes in the middle of the room I trip on them at night. Would you be willing to put them in the corner instead?" If you can't think of a possible solution ("Ug! It's raining again!") then it's a straight-up complaint which needs to say in your head. Now I said you would fail at this. How can this be? I'm supposed to be a Positive Thinker (with capital letters and everything). But I tell you this because you will. And it's OK. Don't be upset with yourself. Just laugh and do your best. Because complaining about your complaining? That's so meta.
Do The Work
This one is mentionrd here in the middle but maybe it should be at the top. With blinking arrows. You have to do the work. Working with your thoughts is like working with your muscles. Just like you don't go to the gym once and wake up buff you won't wake up with a completely changed life after reading one article either. (Or will you? OoOOooOOoOh!) And just like when you let your gym membership lapse and your muscles go soft, the same process happens here. The good news is it only takes 15 minutes a day of doing SOMETHING to build these new habits of thought and you don't even have to put on work-out clothes or sweat. Your 15 minutes could be meditation, gratitude lists, scripting... It could be as simple as saying "I want to think thoughts that feel good" and then doodling on a napkin. Something. Every day.
Make More Choices
Making more choices could be a part of "Do The Work" but it's so important I am making it its own key ingredient. Your brain is like a GPS (or a Map App for you youngsters). It goes where you program it. If you don't program it it goes where it's used to going. And because we live in a vibrational world the end result is always a FEELING. (Got a new car? A job? A date? How does it feel? Got an email? A shopping errand? A relationship talk? How does it feel?) For example, if you are used to feeling icky when you go into work, then you will usually feel icky when you go into work. And you may have a lot of reasons why you feel icky. And they may be all valid. But until you DECIDE to feel good when you go into work you won't. Not consistently. Which is why making more choices is key to changing your life. Starting with the choice to feel good is the best one yet. Deciding to be happy no matter what is a prerequisite for all my clients because until you decide this no one can help. Getting up? Decide how you want to feel. Going on a trip? Decide how you want to feel. Going to answer the phone? Decide how you want to feel. Decide. You may not always get what you decide, but you will see massive change - positive, wanted change - in your life with this. I have decided.
Let your jaw drop. Be in awe. Be grateful. Appreciate. Did you know – appreciation is the closet vibration to Source. Not love. Appreciation. But then, what is love if not appreciation? What you appreciate you vibrate and what you vibrate you attract. You are what you appreciate. And if you can't appreciate? You are what you complain about. Eek!
Keep Your Geek
This is like "love yourself" only instead of an image of roses and candles and soft music it's like BAM! Full color out there. It took me having three kids and getting this old to realize: WE ARE BORN GEEKS. You were born a geek. Now don't worry that I'm going to slap a Star Trek insignia on you. You don't have to be a Science Fiction fantastic or a role-player to be a geek. A geek is "a person who has excessive enthusiasm for and some expertise about a specialized subject or activity." And even if you have forgotten it, you were born enthusiastic. You don't just end up on the planet without having a lot of focused desire to be here. And since the purpose of life is having fun, you thought it would be fun. Which means you came pre-qualified as a geek. So even if you try to hide it, your geek is still in there, eager to get out.
What is your particular geek? Well, it could be anything. You could be a geek in:
I heard about a homeschooled kid who adored turtles. It's all he every wanted to talk about, think about, play about, learn about... and so his parents said "yes". I'm happy to report they never tried to keep him from turtles so that he could become well-rounded to their standards (i.e. washed out). Instead, he grew up to become one of the world's foremost turtle experts.
That doesn't mean a passion has to become a profession.
I know a guy who loves to read financial articles so he can understand finance. Why? Because he loves it. You don't know his name because he's not blogging about it. He's just doing it. He's a finance geek.
And you don't have to focus your geek on one thing. Me? I'm a multiple geek. I'm a total Personal Growth Geek. Even when I'm not working with clients or writing to you I'm thinking about it and reading about it and talking about it. But I'm also a Harry Potter geek. And, if you ask my friends, I'm probably a geek in other areas too. Or probably just a total geek.
There is a passion in you for something whether it's a subject (Art History) or a thing (turtles) or a topic (holistic healing) or an activity (drawing) and if you stop trying to hide it, make it socially acceptable, or even understand why you have it you will LOVE IT.
And love is appreciation.
And what you appreciate you get more of.
And since what you get more of is ultimately a feeling...
... your life will feel GREAT.
And what life feels great when it's poor, unhealthy, lonely, or sad? No life. No life feels great like that. Which is why great feelings are the key.
Welcome to TOTAL ABUNDANCE. :)